Picture this: You walk into Monday morning's staff meeting and three people immediately need you to solve their weekend disasters. Two others are waiting for your green light on decisions they should have made themselves. Everyone's looking at you like you're the only person in the room with answers.
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And you smile and say, "Sure, I'll handle it."
Sound familiar? If you're an executive pastor caught in what I call the "superhero complex," this post is for you.
The Making of a Ministry Superhero
Here's the thing about executive pastors—you're trained to be fixers. It's literally in the job description. A problem surfaces during worship? You handle it. Financial crisis hits? You're the calm presence in the room. Staff gets overwhelmed? You absorb the pressure and keep things moving.
And honestly, being good at solving problems isn't the issue. You can be an incredibly effective executive pastor precisely because you excel at finding solutions. That's not what we're talking about here.
The problem emerges when you start believing that leadership means never being human—never showing uncertainty, never admitting you don't have an answer, never letting your team see you wrestle with difficult decisions.
The Drift: What Your Team is Really Learning
When you operate from this superhero mindset, something happens behind the scenes that you never intended to teach. I call it "the drift," and it's quietly undermining everything you're trying to build.
Your team starts bringing you only the safe problems—the ones they know you can solve easily. The messy, complex issues? They either hide those or try to handle them alone, often making things worse.
They quit making decisions independently because they've learned that you'll step in anyway. Why risk getting it wrong when Superman is in the building?
Most damaging of all, they begin hiding their own struggles and questions because you never show yours. If the executive pastor always has it together, what does that say about staff members who are wrestling with doubt, learning new skills, or facing challenges?
Here's the brutal truth: Your competence becomes their incompetence. And when you finally hit a wall—because even superheroes have limits—they don't know how to function without you.
"But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me." - 2 Corinthians 12:9
What Your Team Actually Needs
Your team doesn't need a superhero executive pastor. They need someone who shows them how to think, not just what to think.
They need to see you process uncertainty rather than always projecting complete confidence. They need to watch you wrestle with difficult decisions, not just receive your final verdict.
Think about the leaders who have most impacted your own development. Were they the ones who seemed perfect and untouchable? Or were they the ones who let you into their thinking process, who admitted when they were learning something new, who changed course when they received better information?
Practical Ways to Lead with Humanity
So what does authentic executive pastor leadership actually look like in practice?
Say "I don't know" when you don't know. Revolutionary concept, right? But those three words do something powerful—they give your team permission to not have all the answers either.
Ask your team for input on decisions you're facing. This isn't about becoming indecisive or avoiding responsibility. It's about modeling collaborative leadership and showing that good decisions often come from multiple perspectives.
Share when you're learning something new. Whether it's a leadership book that's challenging your thinking or a conference session that shifted your perspective, let your team see you as a learner, not just a teacher.
Let them see you change your mind. When you receive new information or gain a better understanding of a situation, demonstrate intellectual humility by adjusting your position. This teaches your team that growth matters more than appearing consistent.
Show them your thinking process, not just your conclusions. Instead of announcing "We're going to implement this new system," try "Here's what I'm wrestling with regarding our current workflow, and here's how I'm thinking through potential solutions."
Discussion Questions for Your Team
- When have you felt pressure to have all the answers or appear like you have everything together? How did that feel?
- Think about leaders who have impacted you most. Were they the "perfect" ones or the ones who showed authentic humanity?
- In what areas of our team culture do we make it easy or difficult for people to admit when they need help?
- What would it look like for our team to create more "psychological safety" where people feel free to be human?
Building Leaders, Not Followers
Here's what I've observed in churches across the country: When you lead with superhero invincibility, your team learns to be followers. When you lead with authentic humanity, they learn to be leaders themselves.
The strongest churches don't have executive pastors who've developed a culture of dependency on themselves. They have executive pastors who've developed other leaders—people who can think critically, make solid decisions, and handle challenges with confidence.
Your humanity isn't a leadership weakness. In fact, it's one of the most powerful tools in your leadership toolkit. It creates psychological safety, encourages innovation, builds trust, and develops the next generation of ministry leaders.
"Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken." - Ecclesiastes 4:12
Your Challenge This Week
Here's what I want you to try: Pick just one decision that you'd normally make on your own. Instead of simply announcing your conclusion to the team, invite them into your thinking process.
Don't just tell them what you decided—show them how you're deciding. Walk them through your considerations, the factors you're weighing, the potential outcomes you're evaluating.
This isn't about making decisions by committee or avoiding leadership responsibility. It's about modeling thoughtful decision-making and developing your team's capacity to handle similar challenges.
Action Steps to Try This Month
- Identify one area where you'll ask for team input instead of handling it solo
- Create a "learning moments" segment in staff meetings where team members share something they're figuring out
- Start meetings by having someone share a current challenge they're working through
- Implement a "help wanted" board where staff can post areas where they'd welcome collaboration
The Sustainable Path Forward
Your team needs a leader, not a superhero. And honestly? That's great news, because being human is infinitely more sustainable than maintaining a perfect facade.
When you embrace authentic leadership, you're not just building a healthier team culture—you're modeling the kind of leadership that reflects the heart of the Gospel. After all, we serve a God who chose to become fully human, who experienced our struggles and limitations, and who demonstrates that true strength is found in vulnerability and dependence on Him.
The executive pastor role is challenging enough without the added pressure of appearing superhuman. Give yourself and your team the gift of authentic leadership. Show them how to think, wrestle, learn, and grow.
Your ministry—and your sanity—will be stronger for it.
What's one area where you've felt pressure to be the "superhero" executive pastor? I'd love to hear your thoughts and experiences. Send me your reflections at podcast@chemistrystaffing.com.
If you're looking for help building a healthier church staff culture or finding the right team members for your ministry, I'd love to connect with you about how Chemistry Staffing can come alongside your church in 2024.
